A link to my third column in www.longisland.com
http://www.longisland.com/news/05-15-13/how-to-avoid-feeling-inferior-to-others.html
My column
Sunday, May 19, 2013
Thursday, May 9, 2013
Single in the suburbs
My second column in Longisland.com.
http://www.longisland.com/news/05-07-13/ask-me-elyse-single-with-few-dating-options.html
http://www.longisland.com/news/05-07-13/ask-me-elyse-single-with-few-dating-options.html
Friday, May 3, 2013
Dear Elyse,
I just got engaged and my fiancee did a prenup. Included in the prenup were not only monetary matters but strict conditions about my behavior and appearance. I have to stay under a certain weight at all times, agree to have sex with my fiancé 5 times a week, agree to cook meals a certain way, agree to give him massages- the list goes on. I was quite alarmed but he doesn't seem to think that this is a big deal.
Yours,
Demanding Prenup
Dear Demanding Prenup,
I hope that you get to make some demands of your own if he is going to place demands on you. While I do think that it is important to manage your expectations of your partner, I think that needs can change and expectations must be fluid. I think there are some good ideas in this prenup about spending time together, giving massages, and sexual activity, but I think that these needs should be discussed regularly rather than etched in stone. Refuse to sign the prenup and tell your partner your always happy to discuss needs on a regular basis.
Yours,
Elyse
I just got engaged and my fiancee did a prenup. Included in the prenup were not only monetary matters but strict conditions about my behavior and appearance. I have to stay under a certain weight at all times, agree to have sex with my fiancé 5 times a week, agree to cook meals a certain way, agree to give him massages- the list goes on. I was quite alarmed but he doesn't seem to think that this is a big deal.
Yours,
Demanding Prenup
Dear Demanding Prenup,
I hope that you get to make some demands of your own if he is going to place demands on you. While I do think that it is important to manage your expectations of your partner, I think that needs can change and expectations must be fluid. I think there are some good ideas in this prenup about spending time together, giving massages, and sexual activity, but I think that these needs should be discussed regularly rather than etched in stone. Refuse to sign the prenup and tell your partner your always happy to discuss needs on a regular basis.
Yours,
Elyse
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Dear Elyse,
My friend is dating a guy who I've always had reservations about for her. He's temperamental and tends to blame her for things that aren't her fault. Recently, I found an article in the local paper that stated that he had been arrested on petty larceny. How do I tell her without coming across as a know-it-all bitch?
Yours,
Friend Dating a Thief
Dear Friend Dating a Thief,
It sounds like you are concerned for your friend's welfare, which is very noble of you. Your intuition that your friend may interpret your action as malicious or even jealous is unfortunately also correct. However, you will be kicking yourself if he steals her iPhone or even her car and she's having a meltdown. So, I would simply paste the article into the body of an email and pass it on her. Just present it as clear, plain facts and tell her that it's her choice how to act on the info and you respect whatever choice she makes.
Good luck!
Yours,
Elyse
My friend is dating a guy who I've always had reservations about for her. He's temperamental and tends to blame her for things that aren't her fault. Recently, I found an article in the local paper that stated that he had been arrested on petty larceny. How do I tell her without coming across as a know-it-all bitch?
Yours,
Friend Dating a Thief
Dear Friend Dating a Thief,
It sounds like you are concerned for your friend's welfare, which is very noble of you. Your intuition that your friend may interpret your action as malicious or even jealous is unfortunately also correct. However, you will be kicking yourself if he steals her iPhone or even her car and she's having a meltdown. So, I would simply paste the article into the body of an email and pass it on her. Just present it as clear, plain facts and tell her that it's her choice how to act on the info and you respect whatever choice she makes.
Good luck!
Yours,
Elyse
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