Hiding boyfriends from mom

Dear Elyse,
My mom is super- picky. She subscribes to the mantra, no guy is good enough for my daughter. I'm not sure what to do if I have a guy that is important to me. Should I introduce her to a boyfriend?
Yours,
Hiding boyfriends from mom.

Dear Hiding boyfriends from mom,
Here are some suggestions to deal with your overly protective, inspector general mom. First, do not introduce any boyfriends to your mom until you are 30. Then, when you are 30, she will be so relieved that you finally have a boyfriend that she'll accept just about anyone. Second, if you think there is something your mom won't like about your boyfriend tell your mom oh mom by the way I have a boyfriend and he is HIV positive, a drug addict, a player, a convicted felon, and a minor. And then tell her oh by the way, I'm just kidding- but he is ... and then add in the part that she might not like about him. Ok now for the serious advice. It sounds as though you are conflicted. You want your mother to approve of your choices because after all she is your mom. But you also want to live your life and be happy. And we are entitled to like what we like regardless of what our mothers have in mind for us. The best way to get your mother to like your boyfriend is to tell her how nice your boyfriend is to you. mention all the thoughtful things he does for you. What mother would not want her daughter with a thoughtful, kind guy who adores her daughter?
Yours,
Elyse.