Dear Elyse,
I'm in the real estate development business. Like all business people I must engage in some shady and dishonest practices to succeed ( I'd rather not elaborate). I one day told my girlfriend about a measure I was taking on a project. She flipped out and said, "Well how do I know you aren't a lying and cheating with me? Next thing I know you might steel my money or possessions". I believe that I have a different persona with family, friends, and significant others than I do in the boardroom. How do I convince my girlfriend that I can turn my business persona on and off?
Yours,
Bull in the boardroom
Dear Bull in the Boardroom,
I commend you for being honest with your girlfriend. In the long run, honesty is the best policy. However, just because you are completely honest with someone, it doesn't mean that they will necessarily approve of what you tell them. It sounds like you want your girlfriend to trust you and feel comfortable around you. In order to achieve that, you need to demonstrate your honesty by your actions towards her. Gradually, if you are consistently truthful, candid, and direct with her, your girlfriend will grow to trust and respect you.
Yours,
Elyse
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